AN ORDERLY LIFE IS POSSIBLE!
John 15:16 says, "the Father will give you whatever you ask in My Name." Without going into a lot of teaching, this doesn't mean that you can wave the Name of Jesus like a magic wand, and God will give you anything you want. What "in My Name", in the Name of Jesus, means is "in His stead", something that is for Him. Something that He Himself would ask.
We know from Scripture that God would have us to live orderly lives. "But everything should be done in a fitting and orderly way." (1st Corinthians 14:40). This is something we can count on. This is something we know that Jesus wants for us. We can ask the Father in the Name of Jesus, with full confidence that He will give it to us.
WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?
I once knew a preacher who moaned that his family was always in chaos, because of their ministry activities. They disrupted their plans whenever anyone called, even for a trivial matter. He often complained about and resented those to whom he ministered, wearing his family's discontentment like a martyr's crown. Whenever I mentioned scheduling, he would drop into a "What Would Jesus Do?" argument, saying that if Jesus would give up time for anyone, he must do the same. The problem with that reasoning is that Jesus didn't actually do that. Though He often allowed interruptions so He could minister, there were other times that He carved out for His own spiritual strengthening and physical rest. He never allowed Himself to be manipulated by the whim of the masses.
There is much indication in Scripture that Jesus scheduled His time:
He planned to be on the earth only a short time (Jn. 7:33)
He planned what He would do and when (Jn. 2:4).
He began His public ministry at a specific time (Mt. 4:17).
He prayed at specific times (Mt. 11:25,)
He healed people at specific times (Lk. 7:21).
He had a time set for His own crucifixion (Jn. 13:1; Jn. 17:1)
He set out for Jerusalem as the time approached (Lk. 9:51).
He told the woman at the well of the time that was coming when we would worship in the Spirit, not in the temple in Jerusalem (Jn. 4:21).
He deliberately didn't go to a worship service on time, because He had a schedule that He was keeping (Jn. 7:6.)
He didn't stop what he was doing when His mother and brothers requested Him (Lk. 8:19).
He didn't immediately go to friends that He loved when they wanted Him (Jn. 11:5,6).
He didn't allow the crowds to determine His timing, or to rush Him (Jn. 7:30).
There is so much in the Bible about how Jesus used His time that you could do a study on this area alone. His life was certainly not chaotic. He never was pushed around. He was the ultimate Servant, yet with absolute order.
If you are caught in this idea of ministry as a chore, and are serving people with a resentful heart, you have lost your reward! "If I preach voluntarily, I have a reward; if not voluntarily, I am simply discharging the trust committed to me. (1st Corinthians 9:17). That doesn't mean you don't still have a responsibility to minister. You do. But you lose out eternally if you have the wrong attitude. Scheduling your time can allow you to accomplish more and have a smoother running life. You will feel less rushed. Then when an unexpected need comes up and disrupts your schedule, as it will, you can give it your full attention, not worrying about other things. You can preach and serve joyfully, give with a full heart, and have eternal rewards. That's what Jesus did!
MORE TIME FOR YOUR FAMILY
It doesn't seem like it would be true, but it is. If you schedule time for talking with your husband, and playing with your kids, you'll be able to do it with your full attention. You won't be distracted by the dishes in the sink, or the unmade phone call. When it's time to play with your kids, you can just play with your kids!
That sounded mean to me at first. I thought that I should be willing to drop everything for my husband or kids at any time if I were a good wife and mother.
Now I think of it like dating. When my husband John and I were dating, we looked forward to the time we could spend together. It was scheduled (that's what a "date" is). We were both in college, both working, both involved in church activities, and we both had a curfew, so our time together was precious. We made the most of it. We gazed intently into each other's eyes, learning the meaning of every look. We held hands and we laughed, we studied and prayed, we sang, and we talked about every dream and every problem. There wasn't time to not listen. We had a schedule to keep.
But suppose I had told John, for example, not to visit the residents of the local nursing home, because I wanted him to spend more time with me. And imagine that he did decide to give up that ministry, because he wanted to please me. During our time together, when he would rather be at the nursing home, he would be distracted, wondering how the residents were, feeling bad about not being there, resenting my demands (even if they were given in a sweet way). I, on the other hand, would be longing for that undivided attention that I knew was possible, and would be disappointed that he wasn't really "there" for me. I might escalate my behavior, maybe even starting an argument, hoping to catch his full attention. He would be frustrated that he was making this sacrifice for my benefit, yet I wasn't satisfied. It was actually because of our adherence to our schedules that we could enjoy one another fully.
That's how it is with children. They know when you are really "there" for them, and when you are just "putting in time." It hurts them, just as it would hurt me for my husband to take me out to dinner out of a feeling of obligation. I don't want him to be with me because he should; I want him to want my company. My kids don't want me to talk with them or work a puzzle with them (or homeschool them!) because I should. They want me to enjoy their company. And keeping to a schedule, for us, means that we can fully enjoy one another's company. They say, "Watch me Mommy!", and I can really watch. That's very rewarding for us all.
If one of my children is sick, or going through an adjustment period (this includes all of the first two years of life), or really excited about a thing he is doing, of course, I will freely give up my time for him, because I love him and I want to give it. I won't let anyone take it by manipulation. If I am busy working at the computer or cleaning the house, and a child is clamoring for my attention, I stop what I am doing, give him a hug and a kiss, and let him know when I will be available to give him more attention. Then I get back to my work, making sure to keep our appointment when it is time.
My kids protect their time, too. Once my seven year old son showed me a small tear in his toy dragon. I said, "Oh, I can sew that right up." He answered, "Well, you can't sew it right now. I'm playing with it." He recognized that he only had so much play time, and he wanted the dragon for that time. He gave me the dragon during my "mending" time (when I watch TV, I do mending), and he was thankful for the repair.
READY TO MOVE ON?
Now I hope you have read so far and are sold on the idea of scheduling for a more productive and satisfying lifestyle. If so, click a link below to get you started!
Copyright 2001 Kathryn A. Frazier Condensed and revised from Homeschool Survival Kit
